My Mind’s Image

How often do you wonder about the differences between what we think and feel about ourselves and what other’s see? I was thinking about this while on the running trail earlier this week.  I run funny somewhat like a duck, so I have been gently told.  I know I have a bit (okay a lot) of a waddle and my feet kick out to the side. Today, as I started the steep and narrow sprinting portion of the hill my legs were burning and shaky and I silently thanked them [my legs] for getting me to the top one more time. The bigger reality is, according to the doctors, I am not supposed to be running at all. I was born with a genetic hip deformity and had surgery around the age of 2 years old to reposition my hips. I crawled around in a body cast for almost a year. I was very self-conscious as a child and teen and practiced to make my legs straight when I walked.   I still have small steel plates in both hips, so when I was pregnant with my youngest son (24 years ago) I was told I would be in a wheel chair by my late 40’s without a double hip replacement, as this genetic deformity creates gradual bone deterioration of the hip socket. I made a decision that day to prove the doctors wrong.


So today, despite knowing what I really look like when I run, I imagine I have all the stealth, perfected form and finesse of the perfect runner. In my mind it all happens naturally and beautifully, straight legs, speed and agility. From some of the looks I get from the folks I pass, my running gait is amusing…and that is okay with me.  I am grateful that my crooked little legs still allow me to run a10 minute mile or less and on a more basic level hold me up and support me every day.  The best part is that several times a week, in my mind, I get to be a gazelle like marathon runner with perfect form and the best legs in town.*wink*


Hugs, D

Embracing My Weirdness 2.0

 News flash! I’ve always been different, okay weird, and have never really fit into mainstream cliques. I know some of you will find this shockingJ I can still generate a few embarrassing memories from my attempts to fit in during my pre-teen years. Back then I was all too willing to stifle and hide who I was and what I was really liked in exchange for the safety of fitting in. I guess it was a safety in numbers thing? Thank God I sucked at it and was highly unsuccessful. I got my first tattoo at 19 which I hid in public and sent those in the family who knew into a tailspin of disapproval. I felt fierce and it represented how different I was from all the other women my age that I knew! I remain a bit of a square peg and over the years have fully embraced my weirdness, especially when it comes to more ink [with rules], fashion taste, my home decor, and shopping habits.

I fell in love with fashion in 1975 in Boston where I laid eyes on my first Vogue magazine.  After that trip I begged my mother to let me buy magazines on our trips to the city. In the interim, I poured over the Sears catalogue and borrowed fashion books from the book mobile, they had to order them, and when they arrived I studied every outfit. I actually designed my wedding dresses [caught that plural huh?] only two, which my mother sewed. I didn’t realize it but second hand shopping got into my blood as a young girl from the frequent trips [out of necessity] to the nearest Frenchy’s stores with my mother. That bug never left. I am addicted! I have been “thrifting” on my own as a young mother since the late 70’s when people were too embarrassed to admit it. Oh yes, I have had my time of buying from the average cookie cutter retail stores only to be disappointed in the quality and more times than not, leaving frustrated at not finding what I had in mind.

As a long time “second hand” shopper, or “thrifter” the new socially acceptable descriptor, mainstream retail just doesn’t carry the thrill and satisfaction of the purchase for me. . and I have never really been interested in looking like everyone else.  Way back in high school I started sewing my own clothes and re-styling second hand clothing. Today this is called up-cycling, who knew? My real challenge came this summer when I was faced with replacing my entire wardrobe. I decided to do some research and create a classic and quality wardrobe that would last for years. This is another reason I love thrifting.  I have purchased amazing unique pieces that I would never allow myself to buy at full price. Good catch, yes I am cheap! I am talking about vintage and high end designer labels of superb quality and timeless style, not the “throw away” quality clothing available in most retail chains. There is only a handful of quality retail chains I shop sales at.  I don’t feel like I’m compromising my fashion sense, if this was the case I probably wouldn’t shop at thrift stores. Most of the favorite pieces in my wardrobe have been assembled with leisure, and since I have taken the time to carefully select what I wanted, I have rarely regretted a purchase. I have developed a fond affection for vintage clothing and really look for those pieces now.

I have honed my craft over the years, and have my secret spots, and strategies for each store. I am very serious and stealth with how, when and what I buy. I also have limits as to what I will buy. Intimate apparel and workout clothing I pass on. My other addiction is shoes, and I am very particular about them, so I do tend to buy new. I am not saying that I pay full price though! Remember, I am cheap! Having said that, I do own a few pairs of beautiful timeless vintage shoes and they fit my size 10 feet!  When people compliment me on something I'm wearing, I have the urge to reply “Salvation Army! Three bucks!" Okay another confession, I can’t help myself, I often blurt it out, hell, with the new thrifting craze it is almost a status symbol to admit you saved a few bucks. If it is good enough for the new Duchess who just sported a thrifted dress, it must be cool?  I do have a big concern, with this new thrifting craze, I follow thrift bloggers from all over the world, and I am starting to feel like I finally fit in somewhere...that is kind of scary. Looks I may have to do something about that *smile*.