New Year, New me?

So every year as I ring out the old and in the new I reflect on the year past and feel so hopeful about the year to be. I think to myself “this is going to be my year” ( I think that every year) this is going to be a chance to start fresh and do something, really do something, something life changing, something that would make people go “wow” you really did it. I start by making a list of all that I want to accomplish and all of the things that I need to do to accomplish my overall goal, which by the way always has something to do with changing my body for the better.

I write down all of the vitamins I need to buy to promote weight loss, a faster metabolism, or to give me a boost of energy. I buy one sometimes two and I won’t swear that I have not bought three weight loss, weight training, lifestyle changing, workout type books (right now its this one.) to also help me get started on my new year journey of doing something different, something great. Yeah!!  I read and I read and I research and I make more lists. Lists about things I should eat, things I should not, things that are harmful, things that are good for you and things that promote health, things that will damage your health. I arm myself with all of the info that I could possibly need to meet my goals. I watch every possible show (and they all do in January) that talks about health, diet, lifestyle change or exercise that I possibly can. I think about a new sport, hobby or some sort of class that I need to take up for my health and well being. I really put a lot of effort into this and plan on planning to the point where I overwhelm myself completely.

 So then I ask the question, what is it that makes us being able to succeed in reaching our goals? What is it that we have or don’t have intrinsically that makes us just do it, set a goal and achieve it, I think I have only ever achieved a goal when it happened by mistake, or maybe I am just selling myself short, but I have not had that feeling of “ I worked really hard at something and then it was achieved” it has always felt like it happened by default.

What does all this mean? I don’t really know, I guess it means that already I am setting myself up not to succeed. I heard on the radio the other day that by January 10^th most people have already given up on their resolutions. One of these days I just want to set out to achieve this and by god be successful, and before I am 80 please.  But it’s really up to me isn’t it? It’s not like if I put this out there that the New Years gods are going to read it and say “ by god, it’s about time we helped this girl achieve her goals." No, I need to put one foot in front of the other and make it happen myself as I am the only person that is in control of my own mind and body. Drat!! This all means that I have to stop running home, stuffing comfort food in my mouth, laying on the couch and waiting for this miraculous transformation to take place, right? I thought so.